I’m a huge fan of personal growth and have been for over twenty years. One of the things that I believe stops many people from moving forward and being successful in any area of their life is FEAR! I don’t know about you, but I have faced fear on many occasions, and now I like to look it straight in the eye and ask it to give me it’s best shot because I don’t have time to let it stand in my way any longer.
There are only Two Things that Drive Human Beings
There are only two things that drive human beings and that is pain or pleasure. One will take us toward your goals and the other will send you down the same old road that doesn’t get you the results you want. Everything we do is out of our desire to avoid pain or our need to create more pleasure, and unfortunately most people will stay in pain much longer than they need to because they have a BIGGER fear of the un-know, this I know only too well. Yes, I’ve been there, seen it, done it! The best thing you can do to grow and move forward in any area of your life is to get to know yourself and understand what drives you.
So the question is HOW do you change your mind to get what you really want?
So today I’m going to give you five quick and easy steps, that you can use right now, to make a big shift, change your mind and get what you want. STEP ONE – What Do You Really Want?
Choose one area of your life that you would like to change at this time. Would you like a better relationship with your spouse or your children? Would you like to quit smoking? Would you like to make more money? Would you like to start a new business? Would you like to get rid of those extra pounds? What is it, what do you really want? STEP TWO – What’s Stopping You from Getting What You Want?
Most people stay in a situation that no longer serves them because they have not reached their pain barrier. (Which means it would be more painful for them to make a change than it is for them to stay in their current situation). In hindsight it sounds silly, but we do it all the time. I’m going to go back to fear of the un-known. I stayed in relationship that didn’t serve me because I thought to myself, what if I leave and I don’t meet someone better than this. Or maybe you’ve stayed in a relationship because you know it’s going to hurt more if you leave than if you stay. What if we make the money we really want, will that take away your FREEDOM because you think you have to work harder? What if you finally lose that weight, will you have to stop eating the chocolate cake you love so much? So do you see how we build up more pleasure to staying in pain than it is to make a shift toward what you really want?
STEP THREE – How Do You Make a Shift?
You have to link more pain to staying in your current situation than it is to make a change. Have you ever being in a painful relationship, and finally made the decision that you cannot take it anymore and gained the courage to leave and change your life? Most of us have experienced moments in our life where we’ve reached our pain barrier and said, “Enough is enough I have to make a change.” This is what drives us to take ACTION and create something new! Think about any area of your life where something happened that made you make a positive shift. More than likely you reached your pain threshold and this got you inspired to take action. STEP FOUR – How Do You Create Your DRIVE
The key is to link huge amounts of pain to the action that STOPS you from getting what you really want. When we do this, we will avoid it at any cost. When I was sixteen, my parents left on a vacation for a week leaving myself, and my older sister home alone. We decided to have a small party and invite some of our close friends over to the house, word got around and in no time our the small party turned into a huge neighborhood party. One of the alcoholic drinks of choice in England for teens with no money is cider (unlike USA cider that has no alcohol). I drank cider until I threw up and to this day I cannot even stand the smell of cider. If I do smell it I start to dry heave. I associated the pain of this event so that I could no longer come within a foot of this drink. Now the mind does not know the difference between what is real and what we imagine so you have to ask yourself what would make it more painful for me if I stayed here?
Example: If I stay in this current situation for another five or ten years:
How will my life look? How will it affect my health? How will it affect my family? What is the ultimate price I will pay? Who else will suffer if I stay? STEP FIVE – How Will You Reward Yourself?
And finally you have to link MORE Pleasure to the outcome. So what will you get when you make this change? How will it benefit your life or your family and friends? Will you be able to help other people with your knowledge or your financial gain? Will you be able to spend more time with your kids or pay for college? Don’t just make it about yourself most people are not driven by that. Who else will benefit by your changes and how can you help or serve them? I would love to hear your thoughts on what is working for you and how you have change your mind, or what are some of your challenges? Give has much detail has possible because your answer may help someone else push through some of their social media roadblocks. Change your mind and it will change your life. Go after your dreams, because the world needs your gifts and talent. You can do it I believe in you!
Thank you for your support, blessings to you and your future success. I believe in YOU. With Love and blessings,